After a rather long day yesterday, I spent some time alone worshipping the Lord last night. As I did, He said to me,
”
Hanna, don’t speak tomorrow.”
Now, I’ve met plenty of people over the years who have kept a day of silence, and often they’ve learned great lessons from their experience. They learn that life is not about them or that there are a lot of things that go unnoticed when you’re too busy talking. They learn that they are not irreplacable or the only reason one around to save the day. I figured that I was in for some kind of lesson along these lines.
To be honest, I’ve struggled some lately because I often try to justify myself to people when I don’t need to say anything. It’s really just an insecurity issue I have sometimes, and I have begun to recognize it. The other day, the Lord showed me a verse in Corinthians, saying that I have already been established, annointed and sealed by the Lord. I believe the truth of the verse, but I don’t feel like I fully understand what it means yet. I thought this might be the lesson that I would learn today: Don’t talk because God justifies and defends you.
As I scrambled an egg for breakfast (with shredded mozarella cheese for extra flavor and extra protein!), Shannon came into the kitchen, the first to discover my decision to remain silent. Once I finished breakfast, I entered the classroom to prepare for worship. To my dismay, the cat had left us a nice surprise. It seems like she had decided our couch (which is really a matress with a sheet on shoved against a wall and full of pillows) would make a great litter box!
As I carted the soiled sheets and pillow to the wash machine, I encountered Katie, who couldn’t figure out why I was doing laundry at 10am and not speaking. This just made me laugh. It was a joy to serve my team by cleaning up a mess and a joy to do it in silence.
As the day continued, the Lord just showed me funny things again and again. I kept laughing and laughing. At one point, I started talking to some of my girls in sign language. Humorously, I only know the alphabet and the word for coffee, which means that it took us an awfully long time to communicate even the simplest sentences. This made us laugh all the more, and it brought me joy because I spent more one-on-one, face-to-face time with some of my girls than I would on a normal day.
By dinner, I had learned my lesson for the day. It wasn’t anything like I had guessed. God wasn’t trying to punish me or teach me some profound lesson. He wasn’t tired of my flaws and taking drastic measures to fix them.
No, He simply knew that I needed a break and that I needed a chance to laugh. He is my loving Father, and He knows exactly what I need. He blessed me beyond words (literally) today. Silence brought laughter and joy. Some days have been hard since I arrived in England, but today God filled me with laughter and pure delight.
Thank you Lord. I’m so glad that you love me so deeply and meet all of my needs. You are indeed my joy and my delight. I will remember this day for a long time, especially on the hard days when I need a good laugh. I will remember what you have done for me. You are my delight.
